Fallout Shelter for 20,000 from Zombies -- Huntsville, Alabama bites.
It seems like the recurrent stream of zombie alerts has not gone unnoticed -- now, it seems like Huntsville, AL has developed a 20,000-person fallout shelter for their area.
"The terrifying aspect of the Zombies is hard to overestimate or exaggerate," said Homeland Security director Michael Chertoff. "We have reason to believe that Iran is planning to develop ICBM's that can be used to attack the United States within 45 minutes notice. If that happens, then Ground Zero will be a favorable gathering point for the Zombies where they can launch their attacks and sneak into peoples' homes at night and brutalize and terrorize them."
"The city of Huntsville is to be commended for their prompt and timely response to the ever-growing threat of nuclear terrorism by Iran, followed by the unleashing of Zombies on our land," said Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice. "All options are on the table with regard to Iran. If we do not act, then the only proof that we will have is a mushroom cloud, followed by the unloosing of the Zombies, followed by a world apocalypse."
"Fallout shelters have been shown to be a deterrent against Zombie attacks," concluded Chertoff. "Zombies are likely to appear in areas of high radiation, and fallout shelters are designed to keep out radiation. They do not see, hear, or feel; they are drawn to areas of high radiation and thus need a willing accomplice such as Iran." He said that it was imperative for other communities around the country to devise their own plans against the Zombie attacks that would follow a possible Iranian nuclear attack. Plans would involve the seizure of homes, schools, and businesses that could be sealed against radiation and could be sealed off against Zombie attacks.
HELP!!! ZOMBIES!!! GEORGE BUSH SAVE US!!!!!
Obamathon
